hey.. ermz....

juz saw tt channel u show on tV.. muz sae i reallie admire tt gay who came out man.. respect.

feeling sort of shittae nw... my hp is spoiling... itz nt like i care tt much abt my fone animore aniwaes... i juz dun want it to spoil when it is needed...suddenli i haf no more postive thoughts to think..

ermz.. lets see.. i think i haf changed a lot since laz time..i used to nt be wat i am like nw... i guess i was sort of happier.. n i used to haf emotions...

haha.. nt like i dun haf ani nw.. itz juz tt like all the extremes r gone... i dun feel euphoric, or damn damn depressed.. or anithing.. it seems i'm always sumwhre in between.. dunnoe hw all those heartaching feelings i used to haf has gone.. or those crazy times when i juz didnt care whether my life is going aniwhre.... n yeaz.. nwadays i haf trouble expressing myself.. sumtimes i wish i didnt haf to study n all... i could juz live in some village.. but then again.. its nt wat i reallie want... i wanna be something special.. tts one hella thing i alwaes wanted..

nt a top 5% student.. nt some sucessful arse in the corporate world.. or some top player in some sport..

i wanna be Wee Koon...

a good walk wif God in my life..
a shining testimony..
someone tt has touched pple's life
a great personal life
at least 1 thing tt i'm totalfuckingly proud of...n itz nt like anithing will do for me..
n acceptance of myself by myself...

when i die, i dun wanna lie there thinking wat should haf been...

heyyAaZ

todae was an emmm.. veri special day?

yeaz.. so i woke up in the morning.. n den i went to mr amos'es church.. it was the tabernacle of joy...and had a w0ndERfuL service.. yea.. sang loud loud n stuff.. their music is pretty gd maNz..

and den thre was a sermon.. it realized hw great GOD is... yepz.. n how real he is.. n i remembered.. my pastor said once.. "we are worship a BIG GOD.. so we can do BIG things..." haha.. i feel so great.. so thankful to be a christian.. i love u jesus!

haha.. yepz.. and den everione went down.. to pray for some holy spirit thing.. n den started to speak in tongues... haha... i did too... actualli dunnoe is real or nt lohx.. bt it juz felt.. emz.. sort of like i dun even noe wat i m toking.. bt it is some thing prompting me.. scary.... confusing.... but at the same time.. i felt special.. n sort of powerful too... it was juz weird.. altho i dun reallie noe if it realli was the spirit in me...

it all is very special.. to be christian.. is..... well... wonderful... it is hard to describe... i mean impossible to.. God created everything.. he's sovereign...n wells...thre is no greater love!

p.s. i decided tt we r nt animal-kind.. bt god-kind.. n since it is GOD.. thre is nthing i can't do wif his help..=p

and den...

it is harder to believe tt there is no GOd den to believe there is.. aftr the way he touched my life...